C I R C L E

Bestfriends? Bestfriend? BFF?

Go,be a friend and cheers them up while u still can! Do it today bcs tomorrow we might not have the chance anymore.... =)

I believe all of us have one.
As for me I got few of them too...
But why CIRCLE?
Yes, CIRCLE is what I want to bla bla bla about today. Heheh

Twenty-three.
That's my age now. (Quite old huh?)
For 23 years, there's only about 19 years of life that I freshly remembered until now.
19 years ago I am in kindergarten. Going to school with joy because I got to see my friendsssss.

Then, I am growing like other girls. Having F-Drama with my friends, Fighting,ignoring each other, getting back together again,going our way bcs of our dream and Idk maybe reunited again w each other in near future (?)
Nobody knows what's gonna happen. But for sure I learned soooo many things about growing up.
One of it is MY CIRCLE.
What I'm trying to say here is that the circle of people around me. As I get older I come to realized that my circle is getting smaller.

I wonder why...... Did you experience the same thing as me? I am quite good at meeting new people but not if it comes to befriended them.
I seriously have doubt why.. maybe I am too comfortable w old friends that I don't bother to make new one? Idk....

How's your circle? IS IT GETTING BIGGER OR SMALLER LIKE MINE?

D I L E M M A

dilemma

dɪˈlɛmə,dʌɪ-/

noun

noun: dilemma; plural noun: dilemmas

1. a situation in which a difficult choice has to be made between two or more alternatives, especially ones that are equally undesirable.

   "he wants to make money, but he also disapproves of it: Den's dilemma in a nutshell"

   synonyms:

   quandary, predicament, difficulty, problem, puzzle, conundrum, awkward situation, tricky situation, difficult situation, difficult choice, catch-22, vicious circle, plight, mess, muddle; More trouble, perplexity, confusion, conflict, uncertainty, indecision; informalno-win situation, sticky situation, pickle, fix, spot, tight spot, tight corner, poser, facer; informalsticky wicket "a discussion with a colleague resolved her dilemma"

   • a difficult situation or problem.

     "the insoluble dilemma of adolescence"

     synonyms:

     quandary, predicament, difficulty, problem, puzzle, conundrum, awkward situation, tricky situation, difficult situation, difficult choice, catch-22, vicious circle, plight, mess, muddle; More trouble, perplexity, confusion, conflict, uncertainty, indecision; informalno-win situation, sticky situation, pickle, fix, spot, tight spot, tight corner, poser, facer; informalsticky wicket "a discussion with a colleague resolved her dilemma"

   • Logic

     an argument forcing an opponent to choose either of two unfavourable alternatives.

      So now my dear, have you ever been in dilemma? 
     
      Just so you know, I am now in huge DILEMMA everyday in my life. 
     
      There's so many things that I want to reject but I can't because of some people that I loved. 
     
     Hoping that one day they knew I am doing these for them.

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I am blessed with a happy January and yes fabulous February of 2015.
Life has been so much better and I am drowning in so much love for the past days of 2015.

Holiday was awesome. I laughed I cried and I am becoming more matured in everything.
Plus last semester result was good so I leave home last few days with smiles on Mom and Dad faces.

Dear God, I am so thankful for everything and I will always try my best to be better than what I used to be.

May 2015 brings us happiness and joy.

Spread love today. Care about people around you. Be good and most importantly be wise in any situation you are going through.

Since now I am 23 so I guess I have to be 23x more wiser than I used to be.
Y' know people said " A year older a year wiser"

Kbye

Hello Semester Three!

Sedar tak sedar, now I am on Sem 3 (after changing faculty lah).
So 3 more semesters to go then GRADUATE!!! Aminnnn amin aminnn.

Been too long tak jenguk blog so I am gonna summarize amazing things happen sepanjang tak jenguk blog nie.

1. Result last sem naik. Syukur even not DL yet but almost there.
2. Pindah ke rumah sewa baru this sem. Hidup I memang nomad kan? And this is my 3rd house btw. Hahaha. Harap berkekalan duduk sini smpai last sem sebab rumah nie strategik & selesa.
3. Mr Love dah smbg Master and dari perasaan sedih ingatkan takdapat jumpa selalu lepas dia habis Degree last sem jadi happy sangat sebab akan menghadap muka dia jeee smpai grad nanti. HAHA
4. Oh ya, 3 Nov nie Mr Love berconvocation. Hihi. Now already busy secretly preparing for his presents sebab skrg dia tgh pg outstation. Kalau tak mana dapat g beli brg2 tu semua hihi.
5. Dah tukar handphone lama sekarang jadi dh join kelab hengpong touchscreen. Kesian I kan,baru nak rasa dunia "touch touch" nie. Hahaha
6. Okay,now SAD NEWS. Pakcik and Nenek died not so long ago. Dlm bulan nie je,ada dua kejutan yg my family & I feel very shocked to lost two persons. May their soul rest in peace.

Nie je kot for this entry. Tak reti nak tulis panjang panjang lagi dh. Better keep things short & simple. Utk rekod hari tua,mana tau nak imbas kembali memori bolehlah baca balik blog sendiri kan? :')

Babaiii.
* Nak kena revision,ada 5 papers menunggu November nie haaa. Hmm.

#PrayforSemester II

It's May and final is around the corner.

Yet so many chapters to revise.

I am so afraid I couldn't maintain my result for this semester.

There are 6 subjects.

And two out of six is my worst fear.

Managerial Accounting & Financial Management.

These two are so tough for me.

So I can't target much.

Maybe I shall target B's for these two.

And hope I achieve my target. But exceeding the target is much better :)

So dear Semester II,

I hope I can give my best and you compromise too with me.

Lecturers, please don't set the questions too hard.

Just give us the moderate type only lah bah hehehehe.

Together we use this little time to save this semester!

Keep our faith in God.

All the best loveliessssssss.

XOXO

To Queen of My Heart

To Madam Ando Anak Aba.......
Happy Mother's Day Ma.
I love you so much.
Thank you for bringing me to this world 22 years ago.
Thank you for bearing the pain while delivering me.
Thank you for being patient taking care of me.
Thank you for being strict while I was kid because now I get why you did that.
Thank you for trusting me all this while.
Thank you for everything.
I hope you will stay healthy & strong.
You are my idol,my queen & my forever most beautiful woman.
Love you Mak.
Muahhh!

May

Hello May.
Month of assignments and projects.
I am looking forward to cherish each day of you dear May.
Please be nice to me too cause I'll try my best in every work I do within you.
And yes my wishlist is going back for Gawai.
I hope I can make it & enjoy the celebration with my family,
So I am gonna work extra super duper hard to revise all chapters starting your 5th day dear May.

Though there's lot of assignments and projects.
Next Sunday is the sweetest day of you.
Cause it's Mother's Day.
To my most adorable and lovable woman in this entire universe, Madam Ando.
Happy becoming Mother's day Mak.
I love you.
In the past present and future.
My love for you always grow stronger.

K gotta back to work.
Bye.

Mid Semester Exam.

Hello guys! How's your day? Mine is good so far the only bad thing is lazy me. LOL
So have you guys (IPTA friends) finish your midsem exam? If you do then it's great. Congrats & enjoy the temporary freedom as much as you can. Bahahaha. You know final is coming too.
Me? I haven't done yet. Still there are two more papers in pending mode. One is Managerial Accounting & another is Financial Management. Both are "my own" killer subjects. Yeah because my friends semua pandai maaaa. Saya saja kurang bijak sikit tapi syukur dapat masuk universiti owwww. Haha

So since I need to revise more, can't update much here tonight. Jenguk sini pun sebab bosan masa "typical take 5" sebab takdak teman nak sembang haaaa. Housemate budak UiTM & bila dia cuti tinggallah budak Unimas ni sengsorang. Sobs.

Last word, pray for me guys! I hope I can do well for both papers. Yelah harapkan doa korang sebab saya ni pemalas sikit HAHAHAHA. Okay that's nonsense!! What's a prayer w/out an effort kan? Hewhew. I know I know. Just kidding tu harapkan doa je utk berjaya. Hehe. Tata ;)

DiciplineLESS

Wednesday, my free day of the week.

No class and as usual no plan since other friends are having lecture.

I must say that I am quite free since I changed my field.

Just because all the generics & electives subjects can be transferred and I don't have to retake everything.

That's an advantage for me actually.

But I am so sick of my attitude.

The so disciplineLESS me.

I haveeeeeee way more free time than others but I tend to waste that precious time & doing nothing whole day.

Struggling so hard to be hard working & do revision during no class day but end up I will do nothing the whole day. 

Please anybody suggest me any ways to change for better?

I am kinda depressed thinking about this but I think my study pattern/style is not that effective.

Help please.

Takziah

Hari Ahad ni saya pandai bangun awal pulak.
And kewajipan setiap pagi memang akan pegang henpon pastu terus scroll TL Twitter.
Memang habit dah,macam baca news je tiap hari.

Then pagi ni ternampak tweet org yang ada eksiden dekat Jalan Kuching-Serian.
2 maut & 2 parah. Yes memang eksiden selalu berlaku tapi kali ni it involves our university student.
Junior saya lah sebab dieorg baru umur 20.
Semua lelaki,balik ke Kuching sebab esok kan kelas dah nak mula.
Tapi tak sangka lain pulak yang jadi.
Kesian sangat kat dieorg & of course their family yang jauh. (FYI,they are from Bintulu)

Takziah diucapkan kepada mereka. May God bless your souls.

To their family,be strong. Esp the parents. Mesti hancur remuk hati bila dgr berita yang anak dah pergi sekelip mata mcm tu. Huhu.

So people pls drive safely. Memanglah ajal itu dimana-mana tapi marilah kita sama mngurangkan risiko yang boleh membahayakan nyawa.

Again.. Takziah diucapkan. Let us pray for them so they rest in peace! :')

Terharu Bersyukur Terima Kasih TUHAN.

Mak kol . .
Cakap ada suprise. .
Then she said "Kakak,next sem lah we buy a car for you. So study hard. Mak & ayah akan uruskan sebelum kau masuk sem bulan 9 nanti"
Sumpah sangat terharu sebab mak & ayah berusaha & sentiasa bagi yag terbaik untuk anak-anak.
I love you both sooo much.
Kakak janji akan study bersungguh-sungguh lagi.
Takkan pegi kelas lambat.
And yes janji akan drive safely.
Terima kasih Tuhan atas kurnianMU.

Bersabarlah menghadapi kesukaran kerana yang terbaik akan tiba jua kelak.
Happy sangat sebab masalah utama akan selesai tak lama lagi.

Again,thanks God. Thank you mom thank you dad.

Ho ho ho li dayyyyyyy.

Hai helo haluuuu people!
I am so happy finally it's holiday.
Though it's just one week break but I feel like I needed it so much.
One week is enough for me to catch back my breath and feel free for at least a while.

So,happy holiday to friends from other uni.
Spend your holiday well.
Get busy later cause now is ENJOY & RELAX TIMEEEEE :)

Grandmama.

Grandma. 

I believe everyone has one.

Me? I have fives grandma. 

1st: Dad's real mom.

2nd: Mom's real mom.

3rd: Dad's adopted mom.

4th: Mom's adopted mom.

5th: Mom's stepmom (new wife of my grandpa on the mother side)

Yeah,that's my family. Kinda crowded if everybody is gathering inside one house so we need two houses. Kidding.

Today,my aunty (dad's side) post a pic (a very old one) of grandma,my dad & herself back in the year 1982 something.

Grandma wasssss so pretty & young back then. And that pic makes me miss her moreeee.

But she's no longer w me here,she's in Heaven with God.

Out of my five grandmamas, only Mom's real mom (2nd grandma) and Mom's stepmom (5th grandma) that are with me still. And I love all my five grandmama equally.

Okay back to 3rd grandma (Dad's adopted mom). I live w her when I was young. She is that grandma who stay w us out of my five grandmothers. She died eleven years ago due to cancer. And now I still feel like she's w us everyday. 

She's kind,pretty & lovely. She's the one that always defends us everytime Mom's mad at us. She's like our protector & our bff. If Mom prohibited us from taking any junk food,we always ask from her then she'll buy for us. :') That's her love.

Dear Inek,

I love you always.

May your soul be blessed & I believe now you're happy on the other side with your lovely husband.

One day,I'll come & meet you.

Please watch over me & others from the above.

We really are missing you.

RIP. 

Aunty,Grandma & My Dad ^^

Lazada Jjang!

Yeyyyyyy. So happy sekarang ni walaupun tengah high fever. All thanks to Lazada. Muah muahhhhhh to Lazada team! :)

Last Rabu saya ada order powerbank from Lazada. It's my first time actually purchasing from them. Memandangkan last week is Lazada 2nd Anniversary so ada sale. So I just try my luck. Hihi

And jeng jeng jeng . . .

Seeeee! Ni lah powerbank saya. Gold Pineng powerbank. 11200mAH. Harganya cuma RM95 & free postage tau. Oh ya lupa, that day saya order from Lazada I got RM10 voucher. Sebenarnya harga powerbank nie RM105 tapi tolak voucher tu jadilah RM95. Hehehe

Sangat puas hati lah dengan service diorang. Cepat & tip top. Posmen siap hantar sampai depan rumah lagi tu & it's on Saturday!!!! Thanks abg posmen ;) 

Lepas ni takdelah nak kena cari plug sekeliling kampus lagi kalau nak mencharging gadget2. Wehuuuuu. Thanks again Lazada. Now,my first world problem is solved. :P

P/S: Nanti nakla beli brg dari Lazada lagi. Hikhik. And wanna try Zalora too. Tunggu elaun bulan April masuk hahahaha.

Regret

Sad. Insecure. Nervous. And REGRET.

This was about my yesterday exam. Not final exam but mid semester one.
However still. . .to score A for a subject, I need to do well during midterm cause it simply having 30% of overall marks for that particular subject.
Imagine if I can't even get at least 15% during midterm,what more to say during final?? Lagi susahhh lah nak score kalau midterm pun dah hancur.

Now I felt like regretting it because of not being well prepared yesterday. Yelah memang ada belajar sampai naik pusing tapi saya belajar seminggu sebelum exam. Mana cukup kan compare to my chinese friends yang sebulan sebelum exam dah struggle every day. I envy them for being so rajin tapi tak jugak nak rajinkan diri like them. Hahaha. Typical Bumi student :P

Tapi takpe. Esok masih ada one more paper and next week I have to sit for another two. Lepas nie janji akan jawab dengan teliti & baca betul-betul sebelum menjawab. Yesterday tu soalan senang sangat tapi sebab saya duduk lama-lama dalam hall,startlah gatal tangan ni nak tukar first choice answer. Tapi bila balik rumah then sedar yang first answer pulak yang betul. Mana tak menyesal dan meroyan saya balik tu hah..

Sebab tu people said,first choice is more likely to be the best one. Lain kali janji takkan duduk lama-lama dalam hall. Lepas ni,kalau rasa dah yakin dengan jawapan. I am gonna get my butt out of the exam hall & walk out like a boss even it's still early to finish & send paper to examiners. Haha.

Gone But Not Forgotten

MH370...

You are gone but will never be forgotten..
May God bless all the beautiful souls on board,both crews & passengers..

And to Indian Ocean. .

Keep them safe,
Hug them,
Throw away all the fear,
Take good care of them,
Until we come to take them HOME. .

To families & friends,

Stay strong.
Whole world is praying with you & for you.
We will never let you walk alone.
We feel your sadness.
Remember, God always have a better plan for us the child of Him.

To Ministers and all the SAR team. .

God is with you all..
Our prayer is with you..
Stay strong & may all your hardwork brings some answer to it towards the end of the day.
Thank you for being so strong these few days.
Thank you for always doing your very best.

Remember, GOD IS GREAT! Nothing is imposibble for Him. I believe He will shows us the reasons behind all this later or sooner.

Lastly..

Dear MH370, we love you.. we miss you.. wherever you are,please shows us some clue. We will come to get you.

Thanks.

True Colour

Being together after few months and then seeing them everyday, I get to see the true colours.
Maybe it's just me that is trying to ignore things being done to me but all I know is this is not fair anymore.

Sudah puas diambil kesempatan,sudah puas dipijak kepala. Sekarang masa untuk showing my rebel side.

Kalau dulu, keluar pun aku yang banyak tolong bayarkan. NO MORE THIS TIME.
Kalau dulu, aku buat tak tahu barang aku diguna sesuka hati. CUKUPLAH SETAKAT NIE.
Kalau dulu sesuka hati kau nak alih barang-barang aku and ambil ikut suka mak bapak kau je. KALI NI AKU AKAN BERSUARA.

Entahlah, aku tak mintak kawan perfect but at least hormatlah sikit dengan barang-barang aku. Ni sesuka hati nak guna barang, sesuka hati nak bawak balik kawan. Ingat kau sorang bayar sewa rumah ni???

Takpe,memang dah selalu tertulis hidup aku akan terkena bala sial. Biarlah aku sial sengsorang. From now on, I will go on for my right & takkan buat fake smile lagi kalau tengok kau buat semua benda yang kat atas tu.

Lantaklah kau nak fikir aku berkira or kau nak jaja dengan kawan-kawan engkau aku nie kedekut. Biarlah,aku tak kesah!!

Aku tak peduli walaupun kawan-kawan engkau ingat aku sombong or whatsoever,janji korang tau aku sebenarnya tak suka korang datang tanpa nak tanya dulu or inform awal. Main redah je yeee. Ingat macam rumah dia pulak.

Mom, sorry I can't be the daughter you expect me to be. Nak kena rendahkan diri jaga hati orang. Sori sebab kakak can't do that anymore.
Dad,sorry I can't be like you yang sentiasa bersabar dalam apa jua keadaan sekalipun. I just can't because I am a bad girl.

Sorry,kadang-kadang limit sabar tu akan sampai jugak. I just can't tolerate no more!

The Journey just began. . .

This is my second entry for today. Dah terlebih rajin mcm ni la gayanya,kalau dah malas berbulan pulak tak bukak blog ni haaa.

Okay,straight to the point. Entry ni utk adik batch 1996 yg harini dapat result SPM. Tahniah utk yg result cemerlang and to those yg kurang cemerlang,jgnlah bersedih. Keep calm & move on. Sebab ni hanyalah permulaan dunia sebenar dalam bidang akademik.

Actually setiap kali SPM keluar,teringatlah dulu (2009) masa saya pun dpt SPM result. Tipu tak berdebar tapi saya cuba redha dgn result yg saya dapat. Yes,I can't fulfill my parent's wish tapi tetap bersyukur sebab manage to get 7A's and another 2B's. Both Biology dgn Fizik lah yg mengada nak jugak B. Hahaha. Still remember muka my mom yg agak kecewa and muka my dad yg mcm org dh punah harapan. I am such a bad daughter atm sebab tak mampu nak bagi apa parents nak kan? Tapi as time goes by,mak dgn ayah okay jee walaupun takde party nak celebrate SPM result mcm PMR or UPSR. Hahaha. Sedih jugaklah time tu.

So to adik semua,pilihlah betul betul nak masuk uni mana & nak ambik course apa. And masa memilih ni,pertimbangkan sebaiknya. Jgn menyesal kemudian hari. Yelah,kalau course tu kita tak suka tapi kita ambil jugak smpai grad & kerja dgn benda kita xsuka is not a great thing. Doing thing with passion is the best thing to do. Jadi kalau nak jadi doktor,fikir 100 kali,sanggup tak adik adik korbankan masa and spend more w your patients. And kalau nak jadi cikgu,sgp tak mendidik anak bangsa dgn hati yg ikhlas dan mengharap mereka berjaya jd insan yg bguna? And the same goes to other courses.

Rasanya sampai ni je la kot. Okbai adik adik. Goodluck!!

I just can't said these things. .

Okay,this is my weakness.

I can't help myself to say NO or YOU CAN'T USE THIS COZ IT'S MINE.
Or maybe PLEASE PAY BACK MY MONEY YOU BORROW BECAUSE I NEED THEM NOW
Or PLEASE PAY YOUR PART OF THESE STUFFS WE BOUGHT

I am afraid to said all those..
Because when I did "hutang" my friend or I use their money first to pay things,I will try my best to pay as soon as I can.
I feel ashamed if I pay them very late.

So guys,any tips for me to be more confident to say those words?
I am tired of being used sometimes but I don't know how to gather strength to said those words.
Oh God,I just can't!!!!

I wish I am like some other friends that will ask confidently from others what they are supposed to claim.
But me? I am always like this.
Guess that's why I always being the one that "kena pijak kepala".
Huhuhuhuhu.

Help please anyone. This is my biggest problem in life.

Setengah Jalan

Tak terasa pulak Sem II nie dah masuk Week 5. Nih maksudnya dah xboleh add/drop subjek lagi. Kalau berniat sedemikian,memang possible tapi sediakan awal la duit hang 100 hengget. Haha. Utk byr denda tu sbb tak reti arahan yg add/drop smpai week 4 je.

Sedar tak sedar,dah nak cuti midsem. Kalau dah nak cuti tu,mestilah kena test dulu. So,saya punya test next week. Melambak tests melambak jugaklah esaimen dgn projek lagi tak siap. Kill me!!

Next week ada 2 tests. Satu tu essay memanjang,satu lagi pasal database. Haa,yg pasal database ni la yg plg saya takot. Yelah,saya ni budak buta IT. Haritu nak create database pun dah terkial-kial tau masa in class praktikal. Nampak sgt IQ pasal komputer sgt rendah. HAHAHA.

Apepun,tips nak score any subjek nie..kenalah score midterm die. This is what Mr.Love selalu pesan kat saya. Saya bukan dgr cakap Mr.Love tu sebab I Love Him. NOO!! :P.

Semua sebab dia inspirasi saya dalam akademik. He's doing very well dalam akademik tapi kuat jugak bermain. That's why la saya jeles sebab mcm mana la dia dpt berjaya so why not me? Hehe. Tapi jeles dlm hal ni xpe,bagus utk masa depan. Persaingan sihat ni. Hahaha.

Sem lepas pointer cukup makan je so sem ni nak la jugak naikkan sikit bagi dekat dgn DL. Kalau dh berjaya naikkan,bolehlah boost lagi utk sem seterusnya. Ye dak? Nak jugak merasa DL tu sebab Mr.Love last sem dpt DL so kira nak equal la dgn dia kan. Haha,memang takkan habis sifat cemburu saya nie. :P

Tapi cemburu tu cemburu jugak,sem ni sem last Mr.Love. With God's blessing,bulan 11 tahun nie gradlah beliau. Aminnnn sangat. So,of course my campus life will be different w/out him. Selama nie,dialah kawan,dialah lawan,dialah cikgu,dialah ibu,dialah bapa saya kat sini. :')

Jadi,diharap setengah jalan lagi (sem ni) akan berlalu dgn penuh memori indah between us. Nanti kalau org tu dh grad,mestilah susah nak jumpa lagi mcm skrg kan? Lainlah kalau dia smbung Master ke kat sini lagi. Ini harapan saya tau! Hahaha. Say what u wanna say tapi saya mmg suka kalau dia sambung Master kat sini & we can see each other (oftenly) again. HAAHAHA. *ketawa selfish* :P

Ohhh no,dah nak jam 12. Nak merapu panjang lagi tapi esok kelas jam 8. Huhuhu. I just hate 8 am classes. Byeeeeee :'(